John Malkovich and the Garden Gnomes

So it’s been suggested that I don’t write enough about gnomes or something, but that’s weird, because sometimes they’re all I think about, and it’s all I can do to not write about them. I’m sort of embarassed to admit it, but sometimes I’ll lie in bed at night, in the dark, and imagine my gnomes, talking to me.

I just wanna say that I’m so happy to be part of a community that loves gnomes as much as I do.

Church sign

It raises all sorts of philosophical questions about the nature of self, about the existence of the soul. Am I me? Is Malkovich Malkovich? Was the Buddha right, is duality an illusion? Do you see what a can of worms this portal is? I don’t think I can go on living my life as I have lived it. There’s only one thing to do. Let’s get married right away.

The thing is, I’ve never seen the movie.


  1. Go see the movie now, John. Run, don’t walk, to 😉 It is spectacularly good. And then if your mind can handle it, rent The Orchid Thief.

  2. i second that. i watched bjm at the cinema first (ugh – german dubbing) and bought the dvd as soon as it was released. thank god dvds are (or used to be) relatively cheap in germany (bjm: <10 eur)

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